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Band 5.5CEFR B2330 words

Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today esaier. Others disagree Discuss the both views and give your own opinion

The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear position, though the conclusion and the final paragraph contradict each other regarding the writer's stance. Cohes...

IELTS WritingCEFR B2Checked

Prompt

Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today esaier. Others disagree Discuss the both views and give your own opinion

Essay review

Annotated essay

Interactive

Technology is advancing by leaps and bounds. A great deal of persons consider that technology has made purchasing to be simple in these days, whereas others think that technology has made shopping even more perplexing. This essay discusses both viewpoints and I strongly agree with the former opinion for the following reasons.

To begin with, modern technology has made shopping so simpler. People can acquire any products at their home without going to store. To clarify, there are plenty of digital shops are available while humans can order within a fraction of seconds through cellphones or computers. For example, online shopping website provides a plethora of offers and discounts it depending on the quality so that humans can get products with cheap prices. To be more precise, technology has reduced the delivery time too which people get products from around the world and many virtual shops are being delivered goods around the world wide like eBay and Amazon. Therefore, shopping to be easier through modern technology.

In contrast, technology has made shopping more confusing because of the multifarious choices and virtual platforms, and as a result, humankind has more confusion when buying things. Sometimes people have to buy unwanted products due to numerous offers, advertisements and discounts, thus, they become addicted to buying more and more goods from online shopping. For instance, one of the top online shopping websites, eBay delivers plenty of advertisements on social media to stimulate people's buying capacity with a plethora of offers. Hence, technology has made shopping more confusing.

To conclude, although technology has made shopping to be easier because human beings can buy any products from their places without going to shop and it provides plenty of discounts and offers, technology has made shopping more confusing because a plethora of choices and offers so that people have to buy unwanted things by provoking.

In my opinion, about this, I strongly agree that technology has made shopping to be complicated due to its many benefits.

Error patterns

Band & CEFR

Band 5.5

CEFR B2 · High

Assessment summary

The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear position, though the conclusion and the final paragraph contradict each other regarding the writer's stance. Cohesion is maintained through basic paragraphing and linking devices, but lexical range is limited with frequent repetition and unnatural collocations. Grammatical control is hindered by persistent subject-verb agreement errors, awkward comparative forms ('so simpler'), and punctuation issues.

Scoring criteria

Task Response 6.0

Strengths

  • All parts of the task are addressed, discussing both views and presenting an opinion.
  • A clear position is stated in the introduction.

Weaknesses

  • The conclusion states that shopping is easier, but the final paragraph suddenly contradicts this by stating the writer strongly agrees shopping has become complicated.
  • Support in body paragraphs relies on repetitive assertions rather than fully developed reasoning.

The essay covers both views and gives an opinion, satisfying band 6 requirements. However, internal contradiction in the final paragraphs prevents a higher task response score.

Coherence & Cohesion 5.5

Strengths

  • The essay is organized into distinct paragraphs with clear introductory and concluding boundaries.
  • Basic cohesive markers such as 'To begin with', 'In contrast', and 'To conclude' are used to structure the text.

Weaknesses

  • Overuse of formulaic transition phrases and repetitive sentence structures.
  • Reference and substitution control is occasionally weak, leading to abrupt transitions within paragraphs.

Information is arranged with some overall progression, but paragraph internal cohesion is mechanical and repetitive.

Lexical Resource 5.0

Strengths

  • Attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary such as 'virtual platforms', 'digital shops', and 'advertisements'.

Weaknesses

  • Frequent repetition of basic words like 'technology', 'shopping', 'products', 'offers', and 'confusing'.
  • Non-standard collocations and word choices recur throughout the essay (e.g., 'A great deal of persons', 'cheap prices', 'buying capacity').
  • Spelling error present ('esaier' in the prompt, but also 'world wide' split incorrectly in the text).

Lexical range is limited and inadequate for unfamiliar tasks; noticeable errors in word choice and collocation restrict the score to 5.0.

Grammar Range & Accuracy 5.0

Strengths

  • Attempts complex structures such as subordinate clauses ('whereas others think that...', 'although technology has made...').

Weaknesses

  • Frequent grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement mismatches ('there are plenty of digital shops are available') and malformed comparatives ('so simpler').
  • Sentence boundary issues, such as run-on sentences and comma splices in body paragraphs.
  • Frequent awkward verb forms and prepositional mistakes ('at their home', 'from their places').

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but flexes poor control over grammar with frequent errors that cause some strain for the reader.

Writing stats

Words
330
Paragraphs
5
Grammar issues
10
Lexical suggestions
5
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