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Band 4.0CEFR B1231 words

With the recent improvements to internet , people can leave views or opinions on goods or services they have purchased. Is it a good or a bad thing , discuss both giving your own answer with example.

The essay addresses the prompt minimally, but suffers from severe grammatical errors, incorrect word forms, awkward phrasing, and frequent communication breakdowns. The structur...

IELTS WritingCEFR B1Checked

Prompt

With the recent improvements to internet , people can leave views or opinions on goods or services they have purchased. Is it a good or a bad thing , discuss both giving your own answer with example.

Essay review

Annotated essay

Interactive

It is widely recognized that one of the most vital developments in our world from the 20th century is the internet. It is no doubt about that. Nowadays, we have the option to leave a review in the website to recommend the item if is good or bad.

To begin with,I would like to talk about the advantages that the internet and communication networks bring to society. First, improvment is today the people can save a lot of time to buy what they need from his house. Another positive consequence is your can choose many products and see the context and information about the item you want to buy. In other word, you can choose free when no pressure at all.

On the other hand, if you choose live and insolate life that is the negative issue. For instance, the people in the long run keeping alone, could be pick up mental illness, like desorden mental health. Furthermore, I would like to add that if the person starts to buy everything they need online from your home and lives that way lonely they maybe lost immediately in contact with society .

In conclusion, we have to make a balance in our lives between the use technology to improve our job and the family share in the free time. This balance gives us a good health and satisfaction with our life manner.

Error patterns

Band & CEFR

Band 4.0

CEFR B1 · High

Assessment summary

The essay addresses the prompt minimally, but suffers from severe grammatical errors, incorrect word forms, awkward phrasing, and frequent communication breakdowns. The structure is rudimentary, and many sentences are difficult to follow due to poor control of syntax and vocabulary.

Scoring criteria

Task Response 4.5

Strengths

  • Attempts to discuss both positive and negative aspects of online developments.
  • Includes a brief conclusion attempting to summarise a personal stance.

Weaknesses

  • Body paragraph one diverges significantly from the prompt's focus on online reviews, discussing general online shopping convenience instead.
  • The discussion of negative impacts drifts into isolated living and mental health rather than addressing negative aspects of online reviews or consumer feedback.
  • Ideas are underdeveloped and lack concrete, relevant examples directly connected to product reviews.

The response addresses the general topic of the internet and online shopping, but fails to properly focus on the specific prompt component regarding leaving reviews or opinions on goods and services. Arguments are minimal and poorly supported.

Coherence & Cohesion 4.0

Strengths

  • Uses basic paragraphing to separate introduction, body points, and conclusion.

Weaknesses

  • Progression is frequently disrupted by abrupt shifts in topic and confusing transitions.
  • Cohesive devices are either misused or absent, leading to disconnected and disjointed sentences.
  • Pronoun reference is chaotic and ambiguous, making it difficult to trace antecedents.

Paragraphs lack clear internal logic and controlling ideas. Mechanical transitions like 'To begin with' and 'On the other hand' are used, but the sentences following them fail to maintain a coherent line of thought.

Lexical Resource 4.5

Strengths

  • Uses basic vocabulary relevant to everyday communication and shopping (e.g., 'internet', 'products', 'buy', 'society').

Weaknesses

  • Severe limitations in word choice, resulting in frequent unnatural collocations and non-standard expressions ('live and insolate life', 'desorden mental health').
  • Repeated spelling errors ('improvment', 'desorden') and word formation issues.
  • Heavy reliance on simple, high-frequency words with almost no academic phrasing.

Lexical range is restricted and errors in spelling and collocation are frequent. Words are often used with incorrect parts of speech or inaccurate meanings, causing reader strain.

Grammar Range & Accuracy 4.0

Strengths

  • Attempts some basic sentence structures, including simple declarative sentences.

Weaknesses

  • Pervasive grammatical errors including subject-verb agreement mismatches, tense control failures, and fragment sentences ('It is no doubt about that.').
  • Pronoun confusion ('his house', 'your can choose', 'your home') creates widespread grammatical breakdown.
  • Complex structures are consistently malformed or absent.

The essay is characterized by a high density of grammatical and structural errors across simple and complex clauses. Control of basic English grammar is weak and unstable.

Writing stats

Words
231
Paragraphs
4
Grammar issues
10
Lexical suggestions
7
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